Focus on Mexico Blog

The latest craze on Facebook is telling friends "25 Random Things About Me." Those who complete the list of odds and ends about their lives and personalities then "tag" you to do the same thing. After you've completed your random list, you're supposed to "tag" others.

Well, I got 'tagged,' and at first I thought, "oh jeez...I don't want to do this!" But, being fairly narcissistic (is that a word?), I couldn't stop thinking about it. I (go figure) got obsessed with it. And, even though they were supposed to be quick, random thoughts, there's no way I couldn't put some thought into this. So whether you want to know about me or not, here it is...25 random, possibily inane, most likely boring, things about MOI!! I hope you enjoy. Feel free to leave a comment. I would love to hear from you.

1.I used to be very shy....VERY VERY shy! Now I've gone over to the darkside of assertiveness!
2.My guilty pleasure movie is Lake Placid.
3.Over my lifetime, I've lived in 2 cities, 2 countries, 8 houses and owned 2 cats and 13 dogs!
4.I pretty much ALWAYS say what I'm thinking.
5.I love to watch the HGTV and the Food channels.
6.I love to dance and sing; and regarding singing, what I lack in quality, I make up for in volume.:-D
7.I think "Things turn out best for the people who make the best of the way things turn out."
8.I still miss my mother (passed away November 15, 1992.)
9.I love Bill more than I thought I could love anybody.
10. For me, roughing it is a Motel 8.
11. I love to laugh and I love the sound of laughter. One of my very favorite things about Bill is the fact that he laughs well and often, and he's not too macho to act silly!
12. I have seen someone die.
13. I feel that my life 'forked' in a very wonderful way, and I feel very, very blessed living in Lake Chapala, Mexico.
14. I believe the things people say to you have more to do with them than you.
15. I would like to be a size healthier.
16  I'm 63 and I still have a tendency to bite my fingernails. How lame is that???
17. I have not given birth to any children, but I am blessed with a wealth of nieces and nephews, wonderful siblings and stepchildren and grandchildren.
18. Two moments that took my breath away: I have a niece named after me, and another niece wore my wedding dress when she got married.
19. My favorite TV show is "24"...I love the unpredictabilty of it.
20. I am one of seven children...a blended, wonderful family that puts the 'fun' in dysfunctional! Two brothers passed away, so I am now the oldest.
21. I can be sarcastic and I'm trying to break myself of it. It's Bill's least favorite thing about me.
22. I think people who make fun of other people are lacking something in their own lives and the only way they can feel better is to put someone else down.
23. I love my job with Focus on Mexico. If I had written my perfect job description, this would be it.
24. I LOVE my friends and family, BUT I HATE emails that say if I truly care about someone, I will "pass this on."
25. I am an Internet junkie and love to order things online. Thank God I live in Mexico! :-D

Celebrating my 99th Birthday on Purpose; Just because I Can… 

On February 5th, 2009 I am choosing to celebrate my 99th Birthday. Want to hear why?

We moved to Lake Chapala, Mexico in 1995. In May 1998 we had just finished marketing a project called Birds of Paradise and decided to take our new puppy (Rusty) and the motor home and do a “walkabout” around Mexico to explore other areas.  We love Lake Chapala and wanted to learn more about the culture and people, so we set out to explore other areas. (Note: Important point for the following story - at that point, we kind of imagined ourselves ‘retired,’ never to work again.)

After doing a little research we had a number of places we wanted to stop off at. One of them was Catemaco, the Town of Witches and Warlocks, close to Veracruz in the Mountains. As we drove into town, we pulled up to one of the few locations where you could park a motor home. It was across the street from a wonderful cold clear lake. The town itself was as clean as could be and the people seemed very content living in their beautiful little town. Hardly a soul spoke English.

Ray’s Spanish was better (by a stretch) than mine, so I got him to ask around to see who the best ‘witch’ (more appropriately, cureando??) in town was and arrange an appointment for me to see her.

Next day, we arrive on her doorstep and enter a modest room which is her ‘office.’ A simple flimsy curtain covered the back door to her home, which was alive with activity from family members, including children. I couldn’t help but wonder if someone might spring through the curtain at any time during a treatment; at that moment I had no idea what kind of ‘treatments’ she even might do.

She asked me what I’d like to have done and through Ray, I told her I didn’t know, but asked her “what do you do?” She mentioned she reads cards and could do a cleanse, for instance. So after the cleanse (which is a whole different story), I had her read my cards with Ray translating.
It was uncanny how she zeroed in on my life and the people in it. Only one thing she said that didn’t jive. She said our business would flourish in 1999. (Recall, I said we had ‘retired’ in May 1998, and this was just a couple months into our so-called ‘retirement.’)

We left, and continued our travels around Mexico, forgetting my visit with my witch. We arrived home in November and through a series of events (yet another story), we ended up starting Focus on Mexico in January 1999. (We were so busy in the process, the prediction from the witch was buried in the past.)

We sold our condo and signed a contract to build a new home so we needed to find an eight-month rental. At the time, there was a scarcity of rentals, plus we have large dogs which added more limitations. Ray kept bugging the agent to find us a rental anyway and we needed it for October 1st. She told us about one that was being renovated, but wouldn’t be ready when we needed it. We followed her to the property and said we’d take it as we had faith it would be ready.

October 1st we were in her office and she handed Ray the keys and told us the phone number and address, which we hadn’t known when we saw it. We were quite astonished to learn that the phone number had 1099 (Oct 99) in it and the address was 99 Margaret Court. Then we remembered what the witch had told us: “1999 is going to be a very good year for your business.” Shortly thereafter we attended the Black and White Ball for the School for the Deaf charity and they had egg shells with numbers in them as raffles. I told them I’d take all with 99 or 9s in them.

I won:

1. A trip anywhere Continental flies
2. A dinner for two in a new French restaurant in Guadalajara
3. A weekend for two in a resort in Melaque

From that moment, I knew 9s were going to play a big part in my future.
So here we are coming up to February 5, 2009. Last year I ‘celebrated’ my 36th birthday (again) and I was deciding which birthday I’d like to celebrate this year. Then it hit me; I really must celebrate my 99th.

• 2009 is the 10th Anniversary of our starting Focus on Mexico (1999)
• I was born in 1949
• Before Feb 5th, 2009 I am still 59

Today is Feb 6th and last night we had our Farewell party for our Focus on Mexico program and as is tradition in Mexico, I got my ‘face in the cake’ to celebrate my 99th birthday and got to have a whack at the Piñata. For lunch, we took the group to the estate of Omar O’Rourke and they graciously also had a cake for me (and flowers) and low and behold, another ‘face in the cake’ opportunity.

I think everyone wants to raise their kids giving them every advantage possible. So why on earth would a family from Colorado pack it all up and move to Mexico? Everyone knows Mexico is dangerous; a seething hot-bed of banditos and drugs. Right?

Wrong! Lake Chapala isn’t on the drug corridor and I have never even seen a bandito in all my years living here. Thanks Goodness! Those would have definitely been deal-breakers for us. We never would have stayed here if we felt like we or our children were in danger.

We had lived in rural Mexico for five years before we went back to Colorado for a few years. Everyone in Colorado seemed relieved that we had come to our senses and were finally home. But Joel and I had gotten a taste of a different way of life while we were in Mexico that resonated with us on a core level and kept whispering to us to come home.  (Not Colorado—MEXICO! Isn’t life funny that way?!) We have since learned that the old saying around here that ‘once the dust of Mexico settles on your heart you’ll always come back’ has proven true for us.

There was nothing really wrong with our lives in Colorado. Nothing broken; nothing needed to be fixed. We owned a nice house and I was a stay at home mom, homeschooling our kids and Joel had a great job as a Systems Analyst. We had (and still have) great friends and family there. We were plugged into our community and the kids had swimming lessons, dance lessons, etc.

One day, I realized that it would be very easy to accidentally stay in Colorado--forever. It was then that Joel and I talked about what that would mean and living our lives on purpose. We said that if we were going to stay in Colorado we wanted it to be by choice and not happen simply by default. We made a list of pros and cons about both and at first blush it looked largely equal until we rated each pro and con on its level of importance. It was then that Mexico won by a landslide.

The gentle pace, simplicity of life, lack of materialism and emphasis on family values were all things we wanted in our lives. We wanted to give our kids the chance to be bicultural and bilingual. We wanted them to understand what it is to be a minority. None of us understood what that feels like until we moved to Mexico. I wouldn’t trade that awareness for anything now.

Our kids have freedom here like Joel and I did when we were growing up. They can ride their bikes and explore here which wasn’t even an option in Colorado. They can be children here.

And I know this is a blog about raising my kids in Mexico and so I don't want this to be misconstrued, but even Joel has learned to play more since coming here! He's joined a band and spends more of his time making things and having fun with all of us.

And I don’t know if it’s just the people we know or if it could really be true but in general the kids here are more respectful, kind, and happy and contribute more to the community than I have seen in America. Where is the teenage angst?!

There really is no such thing as a ‘generation gap’ here. Mexicans dote on their children and cherish their elderly. Most often, three generations are living under one roof and helping each other out.

Is Mexico perfect? No way! But even that offers valuable life lessons about patience and having a sense of humor and realizing that the world doesn’t revolve around them. Feeling entitled or like society owes you something are not even on the radar here.

Joel and I believe we’ve given our kids an advantage in life by living in such a friendly and safe place where innocence and family bonds are strongly in place. The language, culture and weather are gravy. It’s like stepping back in time 50 years and growing up in that era instead of this one.

I realize that this is a very personal decision and one size doesn’t fit all but for us it has given us far more than we expected when we worked on that pros and cons list all those years ago. Mexico is an adventure…and an experience rich with discovery along the way. 

A couple of my kids weigh-in:

Lily, 14 years old:

Living in Mexico has taught me a lot. Age is unimportant when it comes to friendships. I have friends in their 60s and 70s and friends as young as four years old.

I have more freedom and liberty here. People trust people more. Everybody is friendly and says hello when they see each other on the streets and ask how my family is doing.

There's also a lot of culture here. There's people here from all over the world and nobody feels like they need to change or become someone they aren't...it's very open that way. 

I love Mexico. It is my home. But I still want to see more of the world and now that I have had the experience of living and learning another language and making new friends I know that anything is possible.

Maya, 12 years old:

My life here has been simple and calm. I have a lot of friends here, and it’s easy to be who you want to be. There’s no such thing as the “new fashions” for many people, so we go our own way, living how we want to live.

Also, there is a theatre here where you can do so many things. It is a great place to be when you want to really see the life and freedom there is in acting, singing, playing, telling jokes and just having a laugh with friends.

I am involved in of course, the theatre, I am writing several books at the moment, and love singing and hanging out with my best friends.

I wouldn’t mind staying here all my life; although I would like it if my best friend in the States, (Halley) would come down… say… every weekend!

So the sentence that would just finish this little speech up would be “I love living in Mexico!”